The Music Blog: The Dreaded Zappa Post

The blog posting you have been waiting for anxiously. Your popcorn is buttered and at the ready. Maybe you have a frosty beverage by your side. Margarita anyone?

Honestly, don’t expect fireworks.

Some time ago, about a million years or so, I wrote something or other about how all music fits neatly for me into four categories; music I love, music I like, music I dislike and music I hate or despise, aka, Frank Zappa. I find nothing redeemable about his music, nothing at all. I have seen various music articles proclaiming him to be a genius, another claiming he is one of the greatest guitarists to ever play the instrument. I don’t care.

A long time ago, I commented on a post or created a post that said pretty much everything I have ever said about Zappa in just a few words. I hate everything about him and his music.  So someone felt he had to prove me wrong and replied and said what about this song. I said everything means everything. So the guy mentions another song and another until I told him to stop because I was ready to unfriend and block.  Honestly, I didn’t care that the dude loved Zappa, I was annoyed because he just kept trying to prove me wrong. I don’t care.

Like any artist I have ever made a statement about, I did not come to this decision because of a single song. I listened to a lot of Zappa.

So since I have mentioned my absolute disgust for this so called artist in nearly every blog posting I have made, you have a right to know why I feel this way.

Remember this is my opinion and if you feel differently that’s just fine with me. We can still be friends.

Music to me needs a melody, needs something to bring you along with it, to carry you to a place.  Zappa treats music like a gigantic joke. Look I am not a big fan of Weird Al Yankovick either but some of his stuff is down right funny but you also know he is trying to be funny. Most of Zappa’s music seems to have the goal of convincing you that he has produced a work of genius. I believe Zappa sat in a room and tried to make something horrible as a gigantic experiment to see what he could sucker into buying. He serves up rotten food with a smile and has you convinced that it’s a gourmet’s delight. That goes for Zappa disciples like Captain Beefheart as well. I can see him sitting in a room, guitar in hand, thinking how bad can I make this and still convince people to buy it. He treats it as a joke. Did he somehow produce some gems out of this chaos? No, he didn’t and that’s what separates him from artists I dislike. They still have songs I tap my feet to or sing along. Zappa doesn’t even give you that. Whether its his work with Mothers of Invention or later solo work, thare is nothing he has done that I respect or remotely like.

That’s how I feel about Zappa the clownstick. Now I don’t get a lot of comments on my blog. Seriously I only have four regular readers but if you somehow read this and decide that you are going to prove me wrong then I have the right to publish all comments or not. I have only once not published someone’s comments and that’s because the person was a wacko (clinical term). So there you have it.

Mike out

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