Sometime around 2005 I came home early from work and found that my wife and son were gone, moved in a single morning leaving me with little furniture and having to pick up the pieces. It’s an ugly tale which I have long since processed. My ex and I are actually pretty good friends now and this is certainly not a bashing blog because I simply don’t feel that way nor do I understand why people remain bitter and angry years after divorce unless of course there is abuse in the past. Again this is not about any of that. After dealing with the initial shock I was determined to get back on the horse. Now despite those of you who think you know me, I am terribly shy with the opposite sex, sometimes wickedly scared. Again I don’t need to go into detail. When I tell people this they instantly start to dispute it, tell me how wrong I am. I know who I am. I wanted to explore online dating thinking it might be a better way to meet people so I joined a dating site that was both a dating site and not a dating site. It was more of a single parents support group than it was anything. Sure there was dating but mostly it was something bigger. Many of my friends who I value today come from this group and this time frame. Oh and it was way too much fun. We all had these catchy user names. I was Samurai because I love samurai movies. Melsie was Down_2_Earth.
I will say it was not an easy group to get to know. Sometimes it was like high school, childish games, sexual jokes and innuendos I had not heard since junior high. It was very cliquish and I almost quit. There were a few really nice people though who showed me the ropes. A woman named Shawna helped me out a lot and at least encouraged me to get involved with the message boards or the chat rooms. The message boards became my playground. Even then it was not easy and sometimes downright abusive. There were some nasty individuals there which is sometimes what you get when you have anonymity through the internet. You can make yourself out to be anyone you want. This was definitely a problem. Partly this was because of a member who had angered a lot of people and since there were a few fake profiles it was thought that I was this guy Good Companion. I wasn’t. One thing, he was still lurking around although not for long when I joined. Mel knew everyone, and she seemed at the center of everything so I started to give her a hard time on the message boards and she responded by giving me a hard time. We exchanged emails and she helped me navigate this site and make some friends. I have a million stories. But again this blog isn’t to share a bunch of stories. This is a music blog.
Now me and Melsie seem at odds a lot. In fact we don’t seem to have a lot in common. We still bash each other and probably way too much so lately I have not been trying to bash her as much. I am on a spiritual journey and I want to share that with her and have told her this. I told her I would call but I am scared even though she is the least likely person in the world to make light of this. I have not told a lot of people. I am still working through it and spend every day studying and learning.
So as not to make this 25 pages long which I could easily do let’s get to the heart of this matter. There are a thousand things I love about Melsie, things that make me laugh sometimes hysterically. First of all she is about 6’9”, really she is a giant. She could kick Wonder Woman’s ass if she wanted to. We joke with her because she always wears something that looks very close to combat boots and she is not afraid to use them. I am more than a little askeared of her. I told you we seem to have little in common. I have this theory, of course I do. I have a 100 theories all of them bad but this one is that there really are only 2 kinds of people. There are music people and there are lyric people. Now some people are going to say they are both. Nah these people are either too wishy washy or if they sit down and think they realize that I am right. Now this doesn’t mean that a person who is a music person can’t love some songs because of the lyrics and vice versa but mostly they are going to stick to one or the other. I am definitely a music person. People want to say to me all the time, don’t you love the lyrics to that song. Yea no I don’t even know the lyrics to a lot of songs. I know some but my mind just doesn’t go that way. I love guitar riffs and melodies how songs and the parts of songs fir together. It’s why I love classical music. It’s why I can listen to opera and get it. I am not listening to the words anyway. Melsie is definitely a lyric person. I cannot tell you how this makes me laugh, how it amuses me because she is constantly talking about lyrics and how so and so got right to the heart of it and it speaks to her soul it was written about her and it has so much meaning. Another time I will tell you all why lyrics don’t much matter to me. Coupled with this insane love of lyrics which I find endearing is that Melsie is excellent with names and she knows everyone. She also knows the name of every band member of every band that ever existed including probably bands that never made it. You could say to her man I heard those kids playing in the garage down the street and Melsie would chime in Marcus is a brilliant songwriter, he writes songs that mean so much to me but that band will never work because Kevin is going out with Joe’s girlfriend who’s really a cross dresser named Hortense. You think I exaggerate? Okay maybe a little. Melsie drops names like she has these people on speed dial. I just chuckle. It’s passion. If you know me then you know that’s the way I feel about music too just different expressions.
Now listen my friend isn’t really that bad I exaggerate for sure. She is a lyric person and she does know band members. I feel good I know who the fab four are. John, Joe, Paul and Rusty right? Wait I think Ace was in the Beatles too. Aren’t they from Cincinnati? Or is that Dayton, Ohio? For the record, there is nothing bad about being a lyric person or a music person. One is not any better than another it’s just how they express things. In fact, I am willing to bet there are more lyric people than music people. If anyone is an oddball it’s me.
Look before you think this is a bashing thing. It’s not. These qualities are endearing to me. I wouldn’t want her to change one single bit. Don’t think for a second she doesn’t have the goods on me. Don’t for a second think I am not going to pay for this. I miss my friend. I have not seen her in a while. Do you want to know what kind of friend she is? I don’t have a lot of friends. I never have. The friends I have had though and have now are special. They would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. Melsie is one of the few people I would bleed for. I would sacrifice everything in a single toss of the dice to help her. If I had a dollar to my name and she asked to borrow a dollar I would give it to her. I love her as much as I love a family member and that’s the truth. In my darkest times I know I can pick up the phone at 3 am and tell her I need her and she would stay up all night with an 8am meeting to look forward to and not blink at all. She would probably threaten me, maybe call me a name or two but she would do that if I didn’t need anything. That’s how we are, I would do the same. I can’t name more than five people right now I could depend on more than her.
So other than the music and lyrics thing you are probably still wondering what the hell this has to do with the music blog which follows my music collection. Hmmm, so in 2006 I got a phone call from Mel and she asked if I would make her an 80’s cd. I said sure but there was a lot of music in the 80’s. There were hair bands, speed metal, new wave, electronic, the early stages of what would become grunge and on and on. She said yea all of that. I like all of that. On one cd. Hmmm I said. Could you maybe send me a list of some songs, doesn’t have to be everything just some songs that you want. So she did and her list had songs from the 70’s, from the 90’s and from the 80’s. I asked if I could make her one for each decade and she said sure that would be wonderful. So here is something to know about me. Don’t ask me to make you a cd. I can’t do it. I know too many songs and every time I think of one song it makes me think of 15 others. I started working on it focusing just on the 70’s. I forget how many I ended up with. I let Mel know and she laughed. I started to work on the 80’s yea same thing. Now the 90’s especially the early 90’s that’s my thing right there so I told Mel I was going to have one 90’s to current. I also told her I was likely going to have over a 100 cd’s. She thought this was hysterical but she said if you make 100 cd’s I will drive personally and get them. So we had a deal. I ended up with 105 cd’s, 80 minutes long. I moved to Atlanta in December of 2006 which is actually closer to Mel. She came out to spend New Years Eve because I didn’t know a soul. That entire trip is worth its own story. Melsie sweet Melsie never once asked about her 105 cd’s, never once asked for them and so they remain in my collection and now of course they are mine. They are also next on the playlist so yes I have 105 cd’s to listen to titled Mel’s 70’s collection volume whatever and Mel’s 80’s collection and so on. Every time I tell the story and we dispute ownership and a few people who just don’t get it will tell me to get over it without really understanding what those cd’s mean to me.
I can hear Melsie from here reading this saying even shouting, “I am not” and “I do not do that” and I am pretty sure even a few “I am going to kill him.” What I hope she gets from this is the value I have for her, the absolute unconditional love I feel for her the times I didn’t think I could take another step only to see her post something about the deep secret meanings of lyrics and name dropping the song writer like they talk to each other discussing the mysteries of the world. She is not 6”9”. She is only 6’7”. She is one of the most important people in my life even though we go months and maybe even years without really talking. All that doesn’t matter because we all have those kinds of friends where you can talk to someone after a long time and it’s like you talk every day. I am glad she is my friend. So thanks Melsie.